What keeps a person hanging onto faith in God in a season when God seems silent, indifferent, absent, even hostile?  I think about characters in the Bible, the likes of Abraham and David, who went through circumstances that could encourage one to question God's goodness, God's trustworthiness, or even God's existence, and yet continued to trust in, relate with, and hang on to God. 

An adolescent David is anointed king of Israel and promised that one day God would make him ruler over his people.  Yet for the next 10 to 15 years of his life he finds himself running for his life like a fugitive, more like a runaway prisoner than a king.  When given opportunities to take the throne into his own hands, he refuses and insists on letting God do it.  On what basis does he have reason to trust that God will do it, after "not doing it" for the past 10 to 15 years?  If I were him, I would be very tempted to just start a new course, on my own, without the help or the promises of some God.   Yet David trusts God despite it all.

An elderly Abraham is promised that he will one day be the father of many nations.  He puts it all on the line for God.  One day God commands Abraham to sacrifice his only son, a child he and his wife had waited decades to conceive and the very person through whom God promised to make Abraham this "father of many nations".  If I were Abraham, upon being told that now I must sacrifice my only son, I would think to myself: "Forget this.  This God is messing up my life.  How can I trust in someone so unpredictable and unreliable.  I can't count on him to give me anything that he won't later take away, and for reasons beyond me."  And yet Abraham obeys God.

It's easy for one to say "It just takes faith."  But when disappointment, unexpected misfortune, or unanswered prayer are experienced sequentially or all at once, faith in a God who loves, cares and hears prayer becomes harder to hang on to.  And yet guys like Abraham and David hung on.

I'm not writing this because my life is in the crapper.  (Long footnote: In fact, at the time of writing, life could hardly be more enjoyable.  Today Shar and I are celebrating our 10th month anniversary - 10 months of being married to this beautiful, intelligent, fun, God-loving young woman called Piao Liang Dan.  In addition to work that is challenging and enjoyable, I've had the chance to do things I enjoy: like going rollerblading 3 days in the row, reading a good book, learning mandarin and playing online chess.)

I'm writing this more out of awe that guys like Abraham and David would continue to trust in God, despite evidence that could easily be used in favor of rejecting God.  I don't know what to say in the face of that kind of faith.  Perhaps these guys know something about loving God that I need to learn.